Aaand welcome to a new month’s worth of Fast Return – September-flavoured!

It’s been what they call a ‘slow news month’ out there in the Interior, but we’re doing our best to see that all the news that’s fit to burst for the past month gets… er, burst. On the other hand your regular Fast Returners won’t be around after mid-next week to post this, so this is what you get! No more news from here until October everyone…

OH – AND THERE ARE POTENTIAL SPOILERS IN THE FOLLOWING TEXT…

A WEB OF MAYHEM AND INTRIGUE
So what the Hepesh was that all about? DW Online ‘report’ that they’ve [allegedly] heard “rumours” of a new missing episode find and that it [allegedly] might be something from The Web of Fear. Cue fanboy frothing and not a lot of ‘squee’-ing because we had more self-control back in 1968. Anyway, end of the month, no discoveries of the episodes (but check out that careful wording DWO used – it’s only their job to report rumour, not investigate it. How very modern media!), more than a few angry fans and in all likelihood a very healthy hit-rate for DWO! Not that we’re suggesting anything or anything.

Anyway, there’s got to be nothing more forlorn than a news site that doesn’t ‘do’ news, so in order to inject some purpose to the whole affair and give those plump net-potato fingers a bit of a workout, why not go here instead…

THIS MONTH’S NEW SERIES SCOOP!
Has anyone informed OG yet?

MEANWHILE, TSV DEVELOPMENTS CONTINUE APACE…
All quiet in Hamilton you say?

FOR THOSE NOT ABOUT TO START WATCHING LOCAL SOAPS – WE SALUTE YOU!
But in case last month’s mention of Adam Rickit was just too too ‘niche’ for you genre-afficionados, here’s a list of some properly DW-connected actors who have also appearaed in New Zealand soap operas.

Ilona Rogers
Bruce Purchase
Alan Dale
[that's enough pushing old non-news items -Ed.]

PAST TART TO BLAST FARTS
Kudos to Gareth Roberts for putting the Slitheen in a programme where they’re a hundred per cent guaranteed to find their target audience – the Sarah Jane Adventures. Kids love ‘em, adults… not so much. Seriously – good move. Could you imagine the Torchwood team coming up against them? Say, in a follow up to Combat?

SIN IS IN
Cool! Just when the cost of living increases yet again and crude oil prices send the plastics industry into conniptions, here’s a new range of DW miniatures ready for the fan market. Although it was nice and unexpected to hear that the ‘half’ new figure actually was a scaled-down figure after all. And it’s Mister Sin! Bless.

SHOPPING LIST MAKES HEADLINES
With their purported love of ‘shopping list production’ it’s somehow inevtiable that Rusty Davies and Gaz Russell should find a mutual playground in Torchwood. How intriguing for fan speculators to read in the pages of SFX an actual list of Series 4 ‘ingredients’ for a forthcoming publication – a sort of Tenth Doctor’s Dictionary, if you will – only actually completed this time and done by a publisher. Ahem. Said ingredients make for an interesting cake: Enid Blyton (we suspect Gary’s hand in that inclusion unless he’s planning a return to acting), bannakaffalatta (banana coffee perhaps?), Sensorites (ignore it, it’s probably a Gloss reference). The acronym for Gareth Roberts’ story is apparently TUAWT, although it might be one of RTD’s naughty anagrams for all we know. Truth be told, we love this guessing game stuff – so much better than ‘Stay Tuned’!

AND FINALLY… some music
Dean Gray’s Doctor Who on Holiday (courtesy of YouTube).

This entry was posted on Saturday, September 22nd, 2007 at 12:01 am and is filed under FAST RETURN. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.