Fast Return – July 2007



So Ms Minogue is in the Christmas Special and the world hasn’t ended! Maybe the news managed to be muffled under the roar of disapproval that occurred after LotTL, maybe fans just didn’t see it coming, but overall it seems that cool heads have prevailled, and we’re not heralding the apocalypse just yet. Come December 26 though…


Apart from Messers Preddle and Walker, who on EARTH would bother?


Watch out, Dr WhoPrimeval is here and it’s going to take your ass and kick your name! After revealing more oak in its lead performances than the entirety of Sherwood Forest, Robin Hood didn’t seem to last long as the top contender to supplant our favourite (okay, ONLY) Time Lord. But now here’s a new show with a modern British location, cutting-edge special effects, time-travel shenanigans and a female lead who was once a pop star! Yeah, that’s right Doctor Who – you should be scared! 



Oh yes. There’s a theory of Dave Ronayne’s out there that likens the current series to early years of the old series. But he’s got it all wrong! Surely the series is going backwards in its references. Not neatly and quickly like in LotTL, but more gradually and meandering, like a cat with its head stuck in a paper bag. Sort of interestingly backwards with the tantalising potential for comedy gold pratfalling near the end. And before you all write in and report us to the SPCA, look over this formula and tell us that we’re wrong:


It’s the return of the Eighties, I tell you! Time is reversing – everybody get down!!!


Good call to Alden this month on recognising that RTD has taken advantage of another great Welsh institution and used the Dery Mark II Title Generator for season 4′s episodes. But how cool is that title? So retro, so Seventies. Truly, We Are Living In a Gol- hang on, we’ve done that already, haven’t we?


Fans drooling everywhere in Wellington. You can’t make it up Courtenay Place these days without wading ankle-deep in squee juice. TheOneRing.Net are getting all wriggly over the return of Cyrian McKellan to Wellywood for the RSC production of Lear. Who fans are understandably excited at the prospect of Sylvester McCoy playing the Fool (like he didn’t for Inside the TARDIS…). But it’s just not right! All this fuss over a repeat appearance of Gandalf and the Doctor, when there’s a THIRD alumnus coming in tow to no advance fanfare or jetlagged reception at Wellington International by a consignment of furries and 17 stone elves. People – William Gaunt! Orcini is coming to see us! If he can work a bionic leg and self-destruct device into his role as Gloucester there’ll be no containing us.  


Finally, because under NZ law we are statutorally required to invoke the name of Jackson as soon as the word Gandalf is uttered, we segue as slick as squee juice to the Weta Collectibles. How cool are they? A Dalek exposing himself, a Cyberman sitting down – it’s all the boxes ticked for the sheer dynamism of the new show! And they look great. And they’ll cost a bomb. But to hell with it, it’s the culmination of years of hoping and speculating rendered in three loving dimensions. Who could say no?

21 Responses to “Fast Return – July 2007”

  1. the_other_dave Says:

    The funny thing is, while not totally convinced of the time going backwards thing, both your theory and mine yeild a Baker1 motiffed year 4.

    So what would that mean? Sillyness and High Comedy? = Catherine Tate?
    Threats to the Universe? Sarah Jane and K9 (in their own show, but tick), revealing visits to Gallifrey that annoy fans?

  2. Alden Says:

    When Weta said “classic moments”, I sorta assumed they meant from the classic series too…

    Dashed my hopes for a Rani’s lab diorama, dangit.

  3. Peter A Says:

    A model of the Rani’s TARDIS console room circa ‘Mark’, wit t-rex baby would be sweet!

    But classic is so subjective. One person’s “What’s it for?!” is another person’s Adric strung up in his pyjamas. I’ glad Weta didn’t start with a lovingly recreated version of mutant Sec though – that’d have been a very limited sales opportunity.

  4. Paul Scoones Says:

    Sec’s appeal is subjective too. I’ve just supplied my two nephews (aged 6 and 9) with a set of Series 3 episodes to watch for the first time and they phoned me last night to tell me that they think Sec mutating into a Dalek-Human hybrid is the best thing ever! (and no, they hadn’t seen the RT cover…)

  5. Foo Says:

    Hey Peter – I love your illustration for this post, very cool.

    I must confess, I could be tempted to buy a Torchwood magazine and at the very least probably would buy the first issue to work out if it’s worth my shekels each month.

    So, of those who have seen Primeval – is it good? What’s it worth out of 10?

  6. Paul Scoones Says:

    I’ve seen all of the first series of Primeval. It’s very watchable, but the characters are a bit two-dimensional. At best it’s on a par with average Doctor Who episodes. I certainly found it more appealing than Torchwood.

  7. Peter A Says:

    Paul – Dude, you said “Sec’s appeal’! (snigger)

    I think Weta-wise the choice of featured monsters is sound, although a more dynamic Cyberman would have been better – even one posing with their big spack-off Torchwood guns instead of CyberLumic on his commode.

    If they didn’t go down the trad monster route, which epic scenes would you use from the new series? I’d say that Satan would be a cool model, as would an Ood. And if Character Options think kids would buy a chip doll then one of Brannigan should be a certainty!

    I’m still not sure what to make of Primeval, especially havnig seen the begining of Jekyll and being really impressed by that. I get the feeling with primeval that the monsters are there for the kids and the ‘wife gone AWOL’ subplot is for grown ups, yes?

    And thanks Foo :)

  8. jpreddle Says:

    Torchwood Magazine – Hmmm, I suppose so, since nowhere else – certainly not DWM – is there any coverage. What I do dread though is the kiddy-centric merchandise there willbe for The Sarah Jane Adventures.


    PS: Who’s this Mr Walker?

  9. Peter A Says:

    I think Jono means Neville :)

  10. Jono Says:

    As opposed to Scott

  11. Paul Scoones Says:

    I took “Mr Walker” to mean Stephen James Walker, who as the author of the Torchwood episode guide “Inside the Hub” and also an avowed fan of the series, I imagine certainly would bother getting the tie-in magazine.

  12. Peter A Says:

    he probably would.

    Did anybody else pick up that Jono’s been to the film festival then?

  13. Jono Says:

    Correct… to a point. It could also be a member of the NZDWFC elite circa 1989.

  14. Peter A Says:

    You could be, I hadn’t thought of that.

    I stand by my theory though. And anyone who’d point out your resemblance to a younger, groovier Grant Walker would be just nasty Jono!

  15. Paul Scoones Says:

    Scott Walker had pretty much cut his ties with the NZDWFC “elite” in 1989 (was it ever really an elite…?). Certainly he wasn’t involved any more by the time Trakon took place in July of that year. To the best of my knowledge he’s not involved in fandom anymore, so it seems doubtful that he’s the Mr Walker mentioned here.

  16. Peter A Says:

    yeah, but if the guy who wrote that line can’t put forward his own alternative then what kind of world are we creating for the kids, Paul? ;)

  17. Jono Says:

    Yes but the nose is a definite improvement!

  18. Foo Says:

    I’m lost.

    Um, I’d also like to see Satan chained up – that would make a cool model. In both cases there is more going on then just a straigh creature – we have a Dalek opening his casing, CyberLumic on the potty and I’m sure the last two would be similar ‘scenes’ – perhaps a couple of Ood advancing…or maybe the Doctor in 42, possessed by the sun creature – sun streaming out his eyes?

    Wonder how much these will cost when they are released…gotta be at least $150, maybe between $200-$300?

  19. Paul Scoones Says:

    William Gaunt is not being neglected – he’s just been added to the guest list for the one-day Doctor Who convention in Auckland on Sunday 19 August, along with a third King Lear cast mate, David Weston, who has appeared in two Doctor Who stories.

  20. Foo Says:

    Wish I was going up to Auckland this weekend but alas the funds don’t quite stretch . It sounds like it will be quite a good afternoon too – hope you guys have fun :-)

  21. Zeus Blog » Blog Archive » Fast Return - Armageddiconafanalooza Edition Says:

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