Archive for May, 2010

Fast Return – April 2010

Thursday, May 27th, 2010


[Just imagine we're a little closer to April and a little farther away from June... ahh, better!]

With the Second Coming of the Norton having materialised last month we know, deep down in our hearts, that a third manifestation must not take place. Rather, like the prophetic envelopes given to Pope Pius by the child witnesses of Our Lady of Fatima in 1912 (I’ve overstretched this simile, haven’t I?), the final revelation is a horror that needs be resealed, lest the world itself end upon the unveiling alone. Or something. Or maybe not? Look, he’s done it twice now and since then has expressed a devout wish to be in the programme – has it occurred to anyone that the best way to head these horrors off right now and for all time is just to throw caution and reason to the elements and give the man what he wants?

Miniature modellers really are quite ingenious people, even for their size (ha haaa!). No, really. With Victory of the Daleks having dashed the collectibles market for old school styled Daleks, or at least while the tin-pot terrors have been reinvented, you’d think there’d be not a lot of use for the old, slightly more affordable and sadly out-of-production Micro-Universe Daleks. But no! Because the chaps over on Lead Adventure Forum  have come up with a terrific and fitting conversion on the aforementioned plastic figures. Months before Character Options probably eventually think of it too, I’d say. Droool!

Speaking of games, isn’t it great that we’ve finally got The Adventure Game, a spin-off in-series and interactive computer game featuring a current Doctor and companion and even the Daleks? They really didn’t need to go all out and make it ‘canon’ – we fans are supposed to be the ones anxious about that stuff and besides, the last time the Beeb tried to call something ‘canon’ it had the name Dimensions in Time, but the design is great and the dedication and fidelity to a weaponless Doctor is admirable. How long before other Time Lords get thrown into the mix, we wonder?

Have you been over to the Galleybase ‘Frontios’ forum for present and future DVD releases? Scary. Oh yes, we’ve got a new Cyberman box-set coming out with Revenge and Silver Nemesis in but wait! It’s not the old VHS Special Edition Nemesis and doesn’t have the hokey US doco on it! The Restoration Team’s eventual (and pained) explanation tying in the issues of rights, budgets and (fittingly) the memory cheating over the actual quality of the cuts in the old VHS SE sound pretty reasonable by day. But not to a certain elder statesfan and apologists who’d also like all of Mind of Evil coloured now now NOW too please. It’s ugly. Forum threads opening, being closed again, then invading other threads like some young fan asking about animations. Action being threatened… it’s enough to make you take to your TV set with a hammer, surely?

We’re still a bit peeved the TVMovie update isn’t all that either, what with those extra scenes and alternative opening being overlooked. Where’s that hammer?
And also on the subject of revivals, reinventions, restorations and reimaginings, here’s the latest recolourisation from the really rather talented Babelcolour. It’s The Invasion as never filmed – in colour!


Resistance is Useless!

Wednesday, May 26th, 2010

As you may know a recent Fast Return committed an act that outraged and fumigated a regular reader and nearly blinded another. Outraged because apparently this is Zeus Blog’s ‘form’, this blog’s offence – ‘spoiling’ a detail of an upcoming story, as happened back in 2007. Actually the blinding thing is a bit of a worry because we apparently nearly did for the same reader’s vision back then, too. But flippancy aside, we’re back to the subject of fan etiquette and the reality of spoilers. Last week TV reviewer Fiona Rae commented on her very occasional Public Address blog, saying of the just-screened Lost finale:

Next week, the internet will not be safe.

The fact of the matter is, spoilers are a modern reality, and we have to live with them. Its not even that they exist and can be easily avoided – they are an essential part of fandom embedded in gossip, pub chat, emails, magazine articles, covers and illustrations, TV listings and of course internet bulletin boards. To make matters worse, we’re really not that good on the self-control stakes here; is it because part of our makeup is an attraction to bragger’s rights that means knowledge of That Which Is To Be gives Those Who Saw It Coming something extra to crow over? When Who fandom’s Big Daddy Ian Levine dropped in a distinct mal mot about this year’s series finale on Gallifrey Base a month or so back amidst a discussion on (of all things) the recolourisation of The Mind of Evil it finally hit me that some people for good or ill have no self control, and in fact Nowhere Is Safe.

And that’s nowhere – GallifreyBase generously has a spoiler-free board for discussion of the new series, but you’ll still find subject lines in the form of questions about this year’s finale, and as the above example shows, even the non-TV boards are not free of rumour-mongering or indeed speculation which, frankly, can be just as dangerous as actual spoilers.

So what’s to be done?

The obvious answer is for one to disengage from fandom – at least online fandom, but be wary of the online realms of non-fans or indeed online non-fan realms which increasingly seem to have a publish-and-be-damned approach to spoilers. News headlines on the Web, screen and page are constructed to tease and draw the attention – ‘entertainment’ editors don’t think as we do – stay well clear! And of course idle chatter and overheard conversations in public spaces – potentially disastrous. A hermit might be able to cope with the new paradigm of an attempted spoiler-free life, but that’s about it. Fandom: you’re in, spoilers and all, or you’re out. And Zeus Blog very much intends to be in.

But we’ll be playing safer from here on. Promise.



Sunday, May 23rd, 2010
Doctor Hoo by pu sama (DeviantArt)

Doctor Hoo by pu sama (DeviantArt)






Move over Amy Mebberson…